Bedtime Sucks

Why do kids ruin simple things? More importantly, why do they ruin things like Bedtime? It’s the end of the day, we’re exhausted, the coffee has worn off. Why can’t you give us a break?

Bedtime for parents sucks. If you are someone that has never experienced this, please go step on some legos. This is for the beaten down people who would rather be at jury duty than at a toddler’s bed (by the way, Jury Duty sounds amazing right now-air-conditioned room, peace and quiet for 8 uninterrupted hours). If your kids are anything like mine, you’re probably used to a horrible bath experience beforehand. Why must they hate water and shampoo but enjoy using tonight’s spaghetti dinner as a hairspray replacement? Following up, the children then yelled at me because I didn’t split their dessert cookie correctly? Maybe it was my fault, why didn’t you just give them each a cookie…no, no, Peter you stood your ground and you won, savor the dessert battle victory. You’re losing the war, but you won the battle.

Here are some items that have helped Katie and I enjoy an easier bedtime routine. These took us a few years to figure out and they don’t always work. Each child is different so you’ll have to throw some stuff on the wall and see what works. Hopefully they’ll feel the structure from the bedtime routine and will cooperate, or they could just be jerks and will continue to take away from your peaceful evening.

1. Create a bed time and stick to it. I repeat, stick to this one people, don’t deviate. Force yourself to be the lame people at the bbq and leave early. Odds are, you want to get home anyway and play Call of Duty, ahem, read a book.

2. Create a bedtime routine beforehand. Here is ours,

a. Pick out PJ’s

b. Pick out a story after nap/rest time/school.

c. Choose a room where they will get dressed and read the story.

d. Fill the water cups before you go upstairs.

3. Brush Teeth (3-minute cocomelon video or the awful Elmo song with Auto Tune. When did Elmo start using Autotune?

4. Bath

a. Let the kiddos play, don’t rush them.

5. Execute pjs, story, and get outta dodge.

Now for when they cry and complain again.

This is when our attitudes have to be the best. Take a few minutes to find your happy place so you don’t go after them guns blazing. My usual happy place is earlier in the day when the child smiled and told you they loved you (not a beach in Cabo, because when you come back to reality you’ll face the fact you’re not in Cabo). Stay calm, your precious one is about to fall asleep and the last thing you want to do is show them anger, especially before bed. Also, do not threaten to take anything away from the child, most likely you won’t follow through on the threat and the child will remember this for future battles. Now that we’re calm, we enter their domain.

1. Let the child know you’re leaving in 1 minute.

2. Do the task they need joyfully.

3. Give them the hug, shut off the light and exit.

Remember, everything you do in life is a work in progress. Give yourself grace, just don’t be a Walter Hobbs…

Vaya Con Dios